Thursday, May 6, 2010

Explaining the Impossible

How do you disclose to someone that the person they have known for so many years wasn't real?

How do you explain to people that that person has to disappear?

How do you reveal who you really are to them?

How do you demonstrate to them that if you don't, you are going to break down or self destruct?

How do you untangle all that you have done until now so that you might find yourself?

How do you illustrate to them that it was never them, but rather you?

How do you deal with the guilt they are going to feel and still move forward?

How do you gain the strength to close doors so that others might open?

How do you destroy someone else's dreams so that you might find your own?

How do you tell someone goodbye?

How do you explain the impossible?

5 comments:

Halle said...

Kelli, the fact that you care enough to ask these questions reveals the love you have for these people you speak of.

Is it not possible that the person you are saying goodbye to in all of these questions always had this quality of love and kindness, and somehow will still be there, but better in this new person they have yet to meet?

What I'm suggesting is that you have assumed that moving forward means closing a door. Maybe it is enough to move through the opening, allowing others to follow you through in their time because they love you too.

This is only a hope that I have, for we all will travel a similar path and need to wrestle with these issues.

It might help to know there is a chorus with high hopes for your success in answering these questions and finding some peace on the other side.

A big virtual hug,

Halle

Sophie Jean said...

Gently,
Honestly,
With careful thought
And consideration,
Listening
To their response,
Understanding,
Crying together,
With regret and sincere apologies
For your silence,
And most of all,
With Love

Hugs,
Sophie

Kelli Bennett said...

Both of you thank you. I will have a post up soon regarding some of the posts you have seen recently.

@Halle, unfortunately I know some doors will have to close. Not because I think they will because I know they will. I have been informed inasmuch that it will happen when I open the others.

As for other doors. No idea. Some might stay open others may not. I fantastic woman once told me you cannot expect anything for certain and places you thought would accept didn't. I others you didn't think would accept it did.

Laura Bennett said...

What a great summary of my own thoughts. It's funny because the more I read your blog, the more I see myself. The agony we feel sometimes is nothing more than self doubt. It really has little to do with others, but is rather the reflection of how we see ourselves through others eyes.

You are too thoughtful and considerate for people to stray too far from you. Sometimes we just have to have faith that we are where we are supposed to be.

Kelli Bennett said...

Laura, Thank you. However as thoughtful and considerate I might be, others can and quite possibly will view what I am doing as being incredibly selfish and/or morally wrong. Not saying everyone will feel that way but it could happen.

There is nothing that can be done about it. I don't know how certain people are going to receive this information. All I can do is prepare for the worst, hope for the best and accept what I get.

Knowing all this doesn't make doing it any easier.