Monday, April 16, 2012

Just Push...Pause?

I need a break.


Not that life hasn't been good.

No, no, no!

It has truly been wonderful, fun and amazing.

Yes I still have to deal with some outstanding issues.

Though progress has been made on some counts. Small they might have been.

I actually stood in front of my dad, as me, for all of five minutes and chatted with him.

I wouldn't say we accomplished a lot, he still hardly talks to me but it was something.

My brother is still being a colossal jerk. He didn't even want to tell his sons about me. I guess he was pretending to ignore it. Yet he complains to my mom that I don't call him.

Gee I wonder why?

I also have been breaking rules.

Major rules.

As in I am dating.

Having been single and with all the trans stuff I had to, and will still have to deal with, I had a firm rule of not dating.

Seriously I had turned down ever single attempt to get my number or some other form of contact info.

I simply was not going to do it.

That is until now.

Why you ask?

This situation was different.

I knew of him through mutual friends. He has only ever known me, yet he does know about my past.

After several meetings through that group, we ran into each other in public on our own a couple of times over a year ago.

We never exchanged any contact info and I did not see him again until a few weeks ago. I remembered him, he was unsure about me(facial surgery and a drastic change in hair color could throw anyone off) until I mentioned something that happened once between us. He laughed, apologized for not only the incident I mentioned, but for not remembering me at first.

With that we spent the next few hours catching up and finally exchanging contact info. Which prompted an email exchange and him asking me out on a date.

Initially I was going to automatically respond with a no. As I thought about it though I realized that since I knew him, had a casual history, that it might be fun to go just to go.

No pressure to do anything, or see him again.

Plus knowing him and having spent some time with him before I trusted him.

Still don't think I was stupid. I met him at our first stop, did not let him pick me up. Met at a public place. This girl knows what she is doing.

Obviously you know how it turned out. As we are still seeing each other and so far it has been great. One of the best experiences dating I have ever had.

No I am not getting ahead of myself or planning a future. Thankfully he isn't either we are just enjoying the company and the fun. The amount of understanding between us has amazed me.

I also am moving out of my previous living arrangement into a new one. I am actually taking up the spare room with my cousin Rock Girl. She could use the extra cash and the rent is idea for me right now. Plenty of room for the two of us.

This is a huge reason I haven't been able to post. Well, yeah, dating too, but if I am not working, out with the beau, I am at her place prepping the room and closet. Not to mention moving a number of things as time and space allows.

Life is just exceedingly busy and doesn't show any signs of slowing down anytime soon.

Which is all good. I wouldn't have it any other way. I finally feel like I am living my life.

Loving it and I see nothing to slow me down.

Though a pause would be nice.