If you recall this rather old post almost a year ago I was deliberating my name.
Yes, Kelli wasn't going to go anywhere. There was just that issue with the last name.
Earlier this year my mom and I starting emailing to be able to discuss what was happening more after I had come out to her.
In one of the early emails she asked if I had chosen a name.
Which I had.
She never really replied back after I told her. Which scared me since I was very nervous to tell her and what her reaction to the name would be.
Well I forgot to tell you what happen.
I do apologize but life has been crazy busy. I have been working to get the project wrapped up ahead of schedule. Not to mention doing consulting work on the side to earn a little extra cash. With a little traveling thrown in.
Well I found out happened when I had dinner with her last month. [Editors note: I am now having dinner with her once a month. Schedules permitting.]
At one point she stopped me and told me she want to ask about the name I chose.
"Ok what do you want to know?"
"Well how did you arrive at it?"
"Oh well I ended up putting a few names in a hat, so to speak, and I pulled one out."
(I had put in Kellie, Veronica, Heather, Rachel, Amy, and I think one other but I cannot recall. There were a few that I had written down and just didn't like so they were cut before the final choice.)
"Kellie was the one that came out. I was spelling it that way because I never really liked it spelled as 'Kelly'. I eventually saw someone who spelled it 'Kelli' and liked it better that way and dropped the 'e'."
"Well I like it, I think it fits you."
*HUGE sigh of relief*
"What about your last name?"
"Well for privacy reasons I started using Bennett, since it went well with my name and early on I wasn't sure about using my actual last name since it gets recognized so easily. That and transition was still up in the air. I was unsure what I was going to do when the time comes."
"Can I ask you to keep yours for now, I understand you could get married at some point and it would change, but I would like you to keep it for now."
.0002 seconds later, and because Mom asked so nicely.
"Sure."
"Now did you have a middle name?"
"Oh! Well I had been using Ann since it fit with Bennett but that was not set in stone at all."
"Would you let me choose it?"
"Wow! Do you want to?"
"Yes."
"Then sure."
"I think it would be nice if you used Marie."
"Kelli Marie <Lastname>?"
"Yes I think it has a nice sound to it and works well for you, plus I like the fact I got to pick part of your name."
"Then that is what I will do."
And that everyone, is how my name got chosen. I could tell Mom wanted to be a part of it so I was touched she gave me a middle name to go with my last name which I am going to use since she asked.
Thus Kelli Marie it is. Those that know me and read this blog know what the last name is.
I am sure they can put it all together.
All I have to do now is change it officially when the time comes.
Yes, Kelli wasn't going to go anywhere. There was just that issue with the last name.
Earlier this year my mom and I starting emailing to be able to discuss what was happening more after I had come out to her.
In one of the early emails she asked if I had chosen a name.
Which I had.
She never really replied back after I told her. Which scared me since I was very nervous to tell her and what her reaction to the name would be.
Well I forgot to tell you what happen.
I do apologize but life has been crazy busy. I have been working to get the project wrapped up ahead of schedule. Not to mention doing consulting work on the side to earn a little extra cash. With a little traveling thrown in.
Well I found out happened when I had dinner with her last month. [Editors note: I am now having dinner with her once a month. Schedules permitting.]
At one point she stopped me and told me she want to ask about the name I chose.
"Ok what do you want to know?"
"Well how did you arrive at it?"
"Oh well I ended up putting a few names in a hat, so to speak, and I pulled one out."
(I had put in Kellie, Veronica, Heather, Rachel, Amy, and I think one other but I cannot recall. There were a few that I had written down and just didn't like so they were cut before the final choice.)
"Kellie was the one that came out. I was spelling it that way because I never really liked it spelled as 'Kelly'. I eventually saw someone who spelled it 'Kelli' and liked it better that way and dropped the 'e'."
"Well I like it, I think it fits you."
*HUGE sigh of relief*
"What about your last name?"
"Well for privacy reasons I started using Bennett, since it went well with my name and early on I wasn't sure about using my actual last name since it gets recognized so easily. That and transition was still up in the air. I was unsure what I was going to do when the time comes."
"Can I ask you to keep yours for now, I understand you could get married at some point and it would change, but I would like you to keep it for now."
.0002 seconds later, and because Mom asked so nicely.
"Sure."
"Now did you have a middle name?"
"Oh! Well I had been using Ann since it fit with Bennett but that was not set in stone at all."
"Would you let me choose it?"
"Wow! Do you want to?"
"Yes."
"Then sure."
"I think it would be nice if you used Marie."
"Kelli Marie <Lastname>?"
"Yes I think it has a nice sound to it and works well for you, plus I like the fact I got to pick part of your name."
"Then that is what I will do."
And that everyone, is how my name got chosen. I could tell Mom wanted to be a part of it so I was touched she gave me a middle name to go with my last name which I am going to use since she asked.
Thus Kelli Marie it is. Those that know me and read this blog know what the last name is.
I am sure they can put it all together.
All I have to do now is change it officially when the time comes.
3 comments:
That was a very sweet gesture on the part of your mother. It shows she has given you full acceptance. I don't know, but I kind of get the impression that she sort of likes the idea of you becoming her daughter.
Melissa XX
I fully agree with Melissa.. your mom is great.. she may not have wanted you to become a girl but most mothers always want a daughter, so now that she knows you really are her daughter, she's in a way excited that she'll get the chance to spend time with you as mother and daughter.
I wish my mom would come around like that... and my mom even thought I was going to be a girl before I was born... she even had a name picked out, but she wont tell me what is was.
Lets just hope your dad will at least start accepting you for who you really are too.
Actually I am going to do a post about this. As I was my Mom's shopping partner. Gift wrapping assistant, and holiday decorate for years while I lived at home.
I always did things with her that my brother never did. She hasn't said it yet but I am waiting for her to mention that she was always wondering if I was gay.
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